Got Plans? Not anymore…

What’s that you say Mother?

Oh you’ve made plans?

You think you’re going somewhere?

How naive of you to make plans…let me just see how I can thwart these plans of yours…

Will I spike a surprise temperature?

Will I wake 50 times tonight?

Will I spontaneously vomit after breakfast?

Will I act like a complete anti-christ for the day to make you paranoid that an illness is brewing?

Will I eat an entire punnet of kiwis in one day & give myself a dose of the shits to keep us all under house arrest?

Will I wake up at 5am & make you too tired to actually go anywhere to carry out these plans of yours?

Will I develop a mystery cough out of the blue & make you think we need to self-isolate for 14 days?

So many choices, so little time.

All I know for sure is, you aren’t getting out of the house that easily!

Oh wait, you’re going to bring me along?

I feel fine now, let’s go!

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